Same Shit Different Day

Excuse the language in the heading but honestly there is no other way to describe the radiation. You become a robot, everyday is the same as the last. You go at the same time, everyday, no breaks, no nothing, you have to go! If you miss so many days of radiation in a row, you have to start your time over, in order for the radiation to work. After all the time it took to finally get started who in the world would want to start at square one? Nobody that I can think of off the top of my head. I really do not know what else to say about the whole radiation process other than “Same shit different day” because that is exactly what it is. My skin was still gross, it hurt, a bra was off limits, my armpit hurt all the time, in a nutshell, I was miserable. I still managed to stay positive (some days I did not want to) but it was hard. You really do not share everything with everyone while going through radiation, people care, its just they do not really get it, its not their fault they have just never dealt with it so in their minds this is no big deal. Actually going through it, I can promise you it is a very big deal! The coconut oil had started to not work, I was peeling, itching, red, discolored, you name it my boob had it, just yuck! I still kept doing the coconut oil to keep the skin soft and hydrated but the pain was still there. I could not stand being close to anyone because I was terrified they would accidentally hit my boob and I really could not have taken it. At the Monday appointments when I had to see the doctor she always said how good my skin looked, we are getting so close to the finish line, I mean did she have a damn mouse in her pocket, what did she mean “we” are close to the finish line, heck she was not going through this mess. I will say that you do develop a little attitude while going through radiation, I mean you are tired, you hurt, so yes a little attitude is ok in my book! I would get home everyday, try to rest after radiation because I was so tired, I looked forward to dinner being over, spending some time with Mike and Harrison, but my favorite part of the day had became bedtime, so I could just lay and relax in one position and not have to move any part of my upper body. But it never failed when I closed my eyes, my thought was always, what will tomorrows treatment do to my skin, or what is this treatment going to do long term, such a mind game! 

When Life Gives You Lemons…Make Lemonade or Margaritas, whichever suits your fancy!